straight forward vs hard words...

after we had a chat in the wind tunnel..
we had small chats...
one day i messaged in the morning

"GM.. suno.. if possible join us for the lunch .. we would be having kadi chawal"

she joined us fo the lunch..
i was difficult for me as i am not myself in front of her..

anyways..
she sweet said.. "its nice".
Thanks was my answer..thats all we had chat on that day...


another day passed..

it was friday afternoon i decided that now i would be totally following her..

i called after lunch.. and ask to spare some time if free...
she came basement to meet me.. but this time she was along with her friend..

though i little bit awkward.. but was fine with me...
we had some lovely chat.. and came to conclusion that.. people from Art of living are also human beings... :) and also love watching movies..

anyways suddenly her friend said they should leave and they did..


in the evening... shekhar was here..
after some gr8 cookkingggg... i called her.. (10:30..approx)..

and we continue,, to chat..

office..
hobbies,.(though i dont have any... i recently came to know duing call)..
and all that ...
she also toold me that.. its quite evident that i get conciuos when she is around..
(ya i agree openly)..
she also told me during the lunch on that day i looked every where except for her.. to be specific..i look left..right.. down ..up above her head.. but.."..
and at her PG she and her roommate ..made a huge laugh abt it..

any ways its fine..

also..
her friend who accompnied her during evening told her.."see that guy really like us..its quite evident from his eyes".. she replied sweetly... "i know that dear, that he likes me...".



finally as always some serious stuff..
"saurabh, do u really think so we should talk like this on regular basis"..

do u have any issues with it... i have decided some thing and i want both of us to give some time.. thats how i feel ..if u r not upto....then i can force u.. but..

see...the thing is that.. mujhe kya farak padta hai....
but one day i would marry a guy chosen by my family .. and by that i dont want to hurt u...

(mujhe kya farak padta hai... they are really hard word... but she straight forward.. its fine..)

ya ok but atleast on that day u will compare me with him and would decide..

(so stupid of me.. i need to wait till that to make her reliase...stupid of u saurabh)..

ya but fir bhi saurabh ..i want to make it very clear.. its nothing from my side..
and its ok we talk .. but mujhe sach maine kuch farak nahi padta,,,
(again..these are hard,,does it really not matter to her.. anyways,...she is very straight forward.. buts its fin.,..)

fir bhi chalo maine fir bhi aapko call karuga..if u wish and feel comfertable u can talk..
at least i have decide some thing and i want to follow it/...less is left for destiny...
atleast i want to follow somehting..

saurabh u need to understand... aap khayali pulao.. bana rakha hai..aur app...

(nnow its done.. actuallly they were hard...)

ok.. fine.. chalo acha... ab sote hai gud nite..

nahi ab aap phone nahi rakhoge...i am sorry.. i dont meant it...

1 min silencee..

its fine..

nahi i am really sorry..

ok dear its fine,.. we will talk later...

no i really mean it... i am sorry..

ok chalo gud nite

gud nite...

though it was followed by a sweet sorry messaage..
then i called her and ask her to sleep and not to worry she again sweetly replied..

arre neend to aa jayegi uski cinta nahi karo aap..,,. mujhe to bed pe latete hi need aa jaati..

ok.. i though u were little bit distured after the last conversation so though of giving u call and ask to sleep tension les..:)))


any that long serious conversation...
it hurt me....
any ways,,, was it a straight forwad attitude or some thing else..
i knw she is sweet but is she...
or she mean something.. and say something else...

jo bhi hai..
i would keep trying..
might be...

though she keep on hitting me... if she is not really interested and u r making her to do so... is it right...
yadi wo tujhse pyar nahi karti to.. kyu... apne familly se ladd kar yeh kar raaha hai,,
only point u gave in the starting was she is sweet and she likes u... but do she really like u/..?/

shekhar said to check this out...
there is very small difference between straight forward,, or have hard words to hit some one..

u are not liking some one..being at home...
and u says.. u leave now,, as i am not liking u...

its is not straught forward,, its ill mannared....


jo bhi...
as of now.,.. i want to try.. though.. i am lacking that spirits,,
because she is not showing me any interest...
and might be she is correct...
"usse kya farak padta hai..." ............ :(((